## Wednesday, February 13, 2013

As a Jane Austen –Oscar Wilde- all things classic and vintage buff, I had to elect Literature in English in A Levels to subdued my obsession for classics and thought why not use this love for better and actually learn something. Through my learning experience I encountered some amazing pieces of literature and fell in love again and again with the words and imagery of Matthew Arnold, Elizabeth Barrett Browning, Adrienne Rich, John Keats and even Shakespeare. But the ambiguous, beautifully woven words of Charlotte Perkins Gillman in “The Yellow Wallpaper” left me in a state of desperately wanting more rich literature to devour.

An intangible narrative of a woman and her struggle to be someone that she wasn't  this story has a depth that can incite feelings that may have been buried deep in your mind. Her constant fight within herself brought upon her insanity which was inevitable from the initial stance of the story but it was her journey to the moment of absolute madness that was captivating yet so relatable.

The narrator’s faithfulness towards her husband and his doubt that he had for her was a sign of that unutterable, agonizing phase when you let go of everything and the person that you pretend to be is the person you can be, depersonalizing yourself, hence falling into the pits of darkness and sorrow. John’s behavior towards his own wife, treating her as a though she was crazy when she was not and repeatedly treating her like a child making his wife revert to her childlike fantasies only contributed to her insanity.  John forces his wife to repress her imagination. While her "habit of story-making" might have found a healthy outlet in writing, repression of her habit instead damages her. By this stage in the story I began to tamper with my thoughts of the reality of John’s love for his wife. Was she just a trophy wife or did he had genuine love for her?
In “The Yellow Wallpaper”, writing is a healthy means of self actualization denied to the narrator. The narrator portrays writing positively in the story, believing it will help her with her depression.  Others around her, however, heavily disapproved of her writing believing it to be a tiring activity.
Psychologist, Rosenhan at al and his experiment: “Being Sane in Insane Places” is highly correlated with The Yellow Wallpaper in my perspective. The estate was lonely in itself and the yellow wallpaper had become an evident source of both comfort and melancholy for the narrator, burdening her with unwanted feelings and imaginations which were either repressed by her husband or by her own self.
I don’t think I could summarize the entire story and come up with a viable jest just yet, but in the end The Yellow Wallpaper is a story of a truth we tend to pay no heed to; the truth that we are dysfunctional human time bombs waiting to explode into the realm of insanity – the question is: are we ready to face our insane self’s? Would we ever be able to ready?

## Monday, February 11, 2013

### 10 people who inspire me!

1. Mia Thermopolis

"The thing was - I wasn't sure anyone could. Help me out of that hole, I mean. I was down there so deep, and I was so tired ... even if someone threw me a rope, I wasn't certain I'd have the strength to hang on" (The Princess Diaries - To The Nines)

Movie Mia would be the exterior me but book Mia would be the interior me (does that make sense?). God, I cannot even begin to describe how much Mia means to me, how much this book series means to me. I've read all the books, cover to cover thrice and I still need them by my side. There my self-help books, if you will.

2. Elizabeth Bennett

“There are few people whom I really love, and still fewer of whom I think well. The more I see of the world, the more am I dissatisfied with it; and every day confirms my belief of the inconsistency of all human characters, and of the little dependence that can be placed on the appearance of merit or sense.”

Yes, she's fictional but she is the epitome of everything I am. Elizabeth's portrayal in the movies and TV shows are a not as brilliant then the books. Every word she said, her actions are beyond perfection. As soon as I was introduced to her, I knew I found my favorite person (be it fictional) in my world.

3. Hermione Granger

Hermione: You'll be okay, Harry. You're a great wizard. You really are.
Harry: Not as good as you.
Hermione: Me? Books and cleverness. There are more important things: friendship and bravery. And Harry, just be careful.

Hermione is a bad ass nerd. She was and still is a consent that being a "nerd" isn't that bad in fact she inspired and motivated me to become text book smart. Her ability to be determined yet sympathetic  smart yet witty and just so totally awesome makes me want to be her best friend.

5. Gracie Hart

Gracie Hart: In Hawaii, don't they use aloha for, like, hello and goodbye?
Alana: So?
Gracie Hart: So if you're on the phone with somebody and they won't stop talking, how do you get them? You say, 'Okay take care, aloha' don't they just start over again?

Who doesn't love Gracie? Another bad ass with amazing hair! She made me realize that is doesn't always have to be about the hair, the makeup or the clothes, sometimes it's what YOU think and want that counts. Plus she is freaking hilarious!

6. Phil Dunphy

"The most amazing things that can happen to a human can happen to you, if you just lower your expectations."

Phil reminds me that it's okay to be a awkward-clumsy-inappropriate- human being, basically he reminds me it's okay to be me.

7. Charles Trippy

He's an actual person, not fictional so "yay me" for that.

If it's possible for a person miles away to save a life, then Charles Trippy as done that. I was legitimately (still am but like blackouts, you know?) depressed and I needed a reason to be okay, Charles made me feel happy. His wife Alli whose next on my list, were there everyday, with their positiveness and hopefulness that made me realize that life can't be bad forever.

8. Alli Trippy

A perfect imperfection. Quirky, sarcastic, loving, nerdy makes up Alli. She's like the big sister I never had and always with a doubt makes me work harder for what I want and both Charles and Alli had made me realize that the little things do count.

9. SHAYTARDS

Another YouTube inspiration. The SHAYTARDS are just unbelievably happy and they make you want to be happy - it's a  plague of happiness! One you watch them, you'll know what I mean.

10. My Literature Teacher - Mrs. Annie

Okay now I realize this may sound kiss ass-y but it's not. Seriously. You know how everyone has that one teacher who you'll remember forever, the one teacher the makes you feel like you may actually do something (like pass my literature exam), the one teacher who cleans a cobweb off a hidden passion - that's Mrs. Annie for me.
She inspired me to start writing again, to be myself and that it's okay to be nerdy! She may not know it, but indirectly she has made a HUGE impact in my life. So if she's reading this: thank you for everything and I admire and adore you very much!

Lot's of love,
Kay x

## Sunday, February 3, 2013

### "a streetcar named desire" - a 'miniview'.

 A mini review of "a streetcar named desire" by Tennesse Williams.

### Uttering a word is like striking a note on the keyboard of the imagination.

“Words are pale shadows of forgotten names. As names have power, words have power. Words can light fires in the minds of men. Words can wring tears from the hardest hearts.”
― Patrick RothfussThe Name of the Wind

hope.

A feeling of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen.

I have hope that one day I'll be able to write with inspiration dripping from every word.
I have hope that I will wake up with the pure joy to alive.
I have hope that everything I ever dreamt for will happen.
I have hope that I may just be okay.

faith.

Confident belief in the truth, value, or trustworthiness of a person, idea, or thing.

I have faith that life will turn around and I'll be okay.
I have faith that something good is bound to happen, one day.
I have faith that all the bad that's happened to me will be whitened out for something better.
I have faith that someone will listen to me about everything I was, am and everything I will be.
I have faith that I will be surrounded by amazing people.

love.

A deep, tender, ineffable feeling of affection and solicitude toward a person.

I will love my family through the thick and thin.
I will love the people that remember me.
I will love the people that will come into my life and make a difference, a good difference.
I will love the people that may inspire me, motivate me and encourage me.
I will love the fictional characters that have made my world a better, happier one.a

life.

The general or universal condition of human existence.

I will try to live life with open hands, accepting all the good and bad.
I will not have high expectations form life.
I will try to make my existence purposeful, meaningful and inspirational.

inspire.

To affect, guide, or arouse by influence.

I will be inspired by people who have made a mark in my life.
I will try to inspire people by my writing.
I will try be surround myself with inspiration, happiness and hope.

Words mean things. When you put them together they speak. Yes, sometimes they flatten out and nothing they say is real, and that is one kind of magic. But sometimes a vision will rip up from them and shriek and clank wings clear as the sweat smudge on the paper under your thumb. And that is another kind.
- SAMUEL R. DELANY, Equinox

Lot's of love,
Kay x

### January's Bookshelf

The month of January has come and gone but it hasn't been that long so commencing: January's Bookshelf (aka what I read in January)

I started the month of with "The Perks of being a Wallflower".

Name of le book: The perks of being a wallflower
Le author: Stephen Chbosky
Le genre: teen fiction, coming of age
Worth spending le money: If you want something to say" Oh my God, I'm not alone" - then yes!

The  book may be an epitome of life for some but for me it was more fragments of reality. Sam and Charlie were the most well written, dignified characters since Elizabeth Bennett and I thoroughly loved every line and dialogue said by both. In the end, Chbosky is another magician weaving his words to make the book a believable and whimsical adventure. I may not re-read it, but nevertheless, I loved every bit of the book!

Sarah Dessen has made her way to my top ten novelists, right after Jane Austen, Oscar Wilde, Roald Dahl Sophie Kinsella, Melissa Hill and many others.

Le book: Dreamland.
Le author:  Sarah Dessen
Le genre: Teen fiction, romance, life.
Worth spending le money: If you want a pause of reality then yes!

The book starts of (just like any other Dessen books) with a captivating scenario which just reels you in. Dreamland is a piece of literary work with characters you will either love or hate. The book is gathered at the seams of Catilin's life and her need for change, how love hurt her then fixed her and how she found herself when she was broken. Her life may just play as an epiphany (not in the religious sense though!) for the reader. Keep the tissue box near, this book may make you tear up a bit. The best thing is the there is constant flow in the story no fixations that will want you to stop reading. I most definitely will read this book cover to cover again!

And finally we reach the end. Usually I can cram up to five books in a month but because of exams I had to cut down to three, not counting my course\text books!

Le book: Eat Pray Love
Le author: Elizabeth Gilbert
Le genre: Fiction, life, travel,spiritual, inspirational, and a wee bit of love.
Worth spending le money: If you need a push to live, love and a sprinkle of faith then yes!

This book is will make you want to live the life you want, have a relationship with your pizza and find your word (you'll have to read the book to find out what that means!) I mean you've got Italy and Italian gelatto, India and it's missing elephants and Bali and it's beautiful, beautiful homes that only cost $10 American dollars for rent! I've re-read this book tens of times and the thing's that Gilbert says will most probably get you thinking. Her way with words moves and inspires the reader. I think I just fell in love with a book! Lot's of love Kay x ## Saturday, February 2, 2013 ### January Playlist! One month, seven songs - here goes! 1. "Titanium" - David Guetta featuring Sia. I like love this song. If you like upbeat, 'I can be awesome' sort of songs then you'll love this but then again I'm sure you've all heard it in Pitch Perfect. 2. "It's Time" - The Imagine Dragons. I owe this song and all it's amazing-ness to Blaine! 3. "Over Again" - One Direction (Take Me Home) Yes, I am a Directioner. Sue me. 4. "U.N.I" - Ed Sheeran (+ (Plus)) "And I don't get waves of missing you anymore, they're more like tsunami tides in my eyes." How can you not like this guy? 5. "22" - Taylor Swift (Red) Not that I am twenty two but this I don't think this song was subjected to only twenty two year olds... 6. "Keep Your Head Up" - Andy Grammer "Only rainbows after rain, the sun will always come again". 7. "Fly" - Nikki Minaj featuring Rihanna "Me against enemies, me against friends, somehow they all seem to become one a sea full of sharks and they all smell blood." My life is a Nikki Minaj song. Oh my.... Lot's of love, Kay x ## Friday, February 1, 2013 ### The "How To" Inspiration Guru ♥ "How To" Study! Disclaimer: This post will not turn you into a complete smart arse just by reading! Productivity may be needed! So being the new year and all I have decided to give ample time to my blog and begin new adventures (it's sounds exciting reading it but in reality, it's a cup of coffee and Ed Shereen -that's as adventurous as it really gets). Woohoo! Exams in four months, I cannot wait - yes, the sarcasm is dripping word by word but being a try hard - may actually never be - positive person, I have come to the conclusion that it has to happen (and by IT, I mean exams, sheesh!) Now I don't actually go to school in a psychical sense, as in I'm home-schooled. Where I live you can opt for homeschooling in both high school and college, so being the social unicorn that I am I chose homeschooling for both. To every one non home-schooled person, this may seem like 'da bomb' (do people still say that? They don't do they.....) but in reality it's hard. So if you're home-schooled like me, or go to school like every normal human being; I have some tips that may help you become what I like to call - "smart enough to pass your exams, impress your teacher and provide a day's worth of happiness to your parents". Step One: Know what you're studying. Ha ha, how hilarious! But seriously, KNOW the subjects you have chosen beforehand. Being in college I had to chose three elective subjects, I read about the choices (with my parents breathing behind my shoulders and chose the subjects which I knew something about. Now this may vary country to country but like any other thing we do, make sure you're comfortable with what you're studying and you know that if all else fails, you can bring at least a passing grade. Step Two: Personalize everything. Have old magazines? Cut them up and stick them on the cover of your journals. I've done that and it's not only fun and you would actually want to write in them and keep them update and pretty looking. It's a form of addiction, my dear readers.  Left; psychology, center; literature, right; sociology Step Three: Make a schedule\timetable. Now when you're Mum say's this, you're like, "Okay, fine - I will, promise" and it's never done. I've gone through every single argument with my Mum when I started doing school at home, it was like WWIII! But after a while, you realize that she was right. Head over to a stationary shop, Target or any online store you like and buy a planner and some colourful pens. I for one LOVE colour in everything, people may think I'm a kid and I know I am but giiirl, you're stationary is going to look damn fiiiine!  Oopsies, it's upside down! Typo - spin out diary in Pixie Floral$9.95
Elect a different colour for each subject. For instance, I have pink for Psychology, orange for Sociology and green for Literature. Not only will this look tidy and awesome but it's gives you a sense of accomplishment, non? I will literally stare at this page for hours as if just by looking at it, it'll get the job done.

Distribute a day for each subject otherwise, one subject may get left out which is sure to bite you in the ass later, trust me!

Decide when you want to study. If you know that you have a lot of work, give more time etc. The best way to do that (because I know how easy it is to procrastinate!) is to make blocks of time for each thing. Want to watch  a season of F.R.I.E.N.D.S (yes, I said season!), make time after you've done you're work. If you tend to concentrate more in the morning like me, wake up, study like hell till mid afternoon, then you're free!

Step Four: A clean table is a miracle!
I swear, my table's span of taking clean is less then a minute but no fear as my OCD side kicks in a makes me clean till I tear up!
A clean desk is a heaven  so try to keep things you'll need like your pencil case, you're iPod (for when you're Mum starts her daily dose of amazingness) and a cup of tea or coffee near by so distractions are close to none.

 The picture is a bit wonky but you get the idea, right?! I do hope so.
Step Five: Let the magic begin!
If you go to school or an institution for extra classes - read ahead and write it all down. Not only will this make the teacher think you're smart but it'll help you so much in advance. Ask you're teacher for a copy of the core studies and get cracking.
When taking notes in class, or writing notes by yourself, colour code what you're writing e.g. blue for heading, red for the important stuff and so on. Not only will this make it pretty looking but visually it'll help you during you're revision time before exams.
Step Six: Have fun while studying!
And no I don't mean by updating you're status or tweeting out to the world. I mean, if you find something funny while studying, like how much of a douche Claudio was to Hero or something that makes you cringe, yes you Freud, let it out because seriously that's about all the fun you may get.

Step Seven: Stick with it!
If you have a study plan, stick to it. If you're having fun while studying, stick to it, if you just like studying, stick to it!

So, I hope that helped! If you want to add something write it down below, and if this did help, tell me how - I'd love to know, and if you ever feel demotivated, just read this again, hopefully it'll help!

Lots of love,
Kay x